28 November 2006
I suppose it is appropriate to share now...
About a year ago, a very good friend of mine (ours) was diagnosed with Leukemia. At first it was one of those, "oh no big deal, we'll treat it and he will be just fine" things (at least that's what I was told). After some chemo, and a long hospital stay, then some more chemo, and more hospital (and other icky stuff), it was determined that maybe he should look into a bone marrow transplant.
He stayed cheerful, in fact, I don't think I've ever met anyone with a better attitude about life and the 'hand' they had been dealt. Though, the decision about the transplant was a difficult one, he held his head high, and came to the conclusion that if he was going to die, he wanted to do it his way... not stuck in a hospital bed somewhere, not feeling awful every day.
In the last few months, he lived his life to the fullest. Making sure to spend all of his time with family and friends, he also lived for himself. Something we all need to learn how to do... to divide our time between family, friends, and ourselves so well, no one feels they are missing out. He gave of himself freely, he loved openly and honestly. He lived the way he always had... with an open hand, an open mind, and an open heart.
At about 7 this morning, one of the most wonderful, sweet, kind hearted, and slightly devious (hehehe) people I've ever known passed away. When my phone rang at 8:30 this morning, and I saw a number I didn't recognize, I knew exactly what I would hear when I answered it.
You know that feeling... when in the space of a heartbeat, time seems to suddenly expand, you get that slight vertigo, you know that time is progressing for everyone else on earth, yet for you... that one second stands still. You know that what you're about to hear is what you've been expecting... yet... perhaps its not what you think. And, you answer the call, only to hear the beautiful voice of another deeply loved friend, shaking and holding back the tears long enough to tell you what you already knew (Love you Kel, thank you so much for calling, and for the picture).
My heart broke this morning. I cried not only for the loss of a true, real friend, not only for the pain of my other friends (my "extended family"), but in a flood of relief for him.
Over the last year, I've said, many times, I wouldn't cry until it is time.
Now it is time.
I love you Drew. Rest in peace.